From the archive:
Hey guys! Let’s talk about L.O.V.E. Not just any kind of love, but one of the most important kinds of love there is, aka SELF-LOVE. Today I want to give you the best advice about self-love.
Earlier this week, I spotted this quote by Lucille Ball: “Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.” Can I get an amen?! But seriously, I love that quote. Sometimes it is so easy to pour our love into others, without realizing that we are not feeding ourselves that same love. Something I have learned over the years is that self-love is something that I have to conscientiously practice each and every day. The moment I began to practice the art of self-love is the very moment I began to receive love in my life in every form imaginable.
I grew up in a very loving household, which also meant that my parents believed in encouraging us with a little thing called tough love. I can recall one day when I came home from school (I believe I was in 6th grade) with an A- report card. The first thing out of my dad’s mouth was, “Why is it an A- and not an A+?” I think this definitely played a role in my fixation on the negative things before seeing the positive things. Stevie’s family dynamic, on the other hand, looked a little more like this. Instead of tough love, he heard things like, “I’m proud of you” or “You will do great next time”. That must explain part of the reason Stevie is the type of person who will find the good in everything and celebrate no matter what. He’s really played a part in helping me focus on the positives in my life.
Loving yourself to Here is my personal prescription for Self-Love:
1. Mindfulness! Be aware of what you are thinking, feeling, saying as often as you possibly can. When you catch yourself focused on the negative, acknowledge it and turn your focus onto something positive. When you are mindful of your own thoughts, feelings, and words, you begin to focus on yourself and not on the perception of others of you.
2. Comparison is the thief of joy – DON’T DO IT! Look up to others without bringing yourself down. It stems back to being mindful of when you are comparing yourself to someone else. If I ever catch myself comparing, I immediately stop and feed myself some positivity, which leads me to the next point.
3. Positive affirmations – aka your new best friends! Something that I find to be helpful is writing down positive affirmations about myself on sticky notes and posting them on my bathroom mirror. Positive affirmations are what I like to call food for the soul. Just like a good breakfast fuel you up to start the day right, positive affirmations will fuel your mind and spirit and will set the tone for the day.
4. Self-care is NOT selfish! Take care of yourself – mind, body, and soul. You are of no use to others if you are not caring for yourself first and foremost. Self-care can be practiced through things like exercising, meditating, getting enough sleep, diet, etc. Devote some time each day to yourself!
5. Eliminate toxicity in your life. It’s this simple…if it isn’t nourishing your mind, body, or soul, get rid of it!
6. Learn to forgive yourself. As humans, we are our own worst critics. We are not built to be perfect. We make mistakes. Use each opportunity, good or bad, to grow. Sometimes we just need to stop and remind ourselves that we are human…aka practicing mindfulness once again! Be gentle with yourself.
7. Don’t forget to fall in love with yourself first. No one will ever make you a complete person except yourself. Learn to love who you are. Embrace who you are. When you have an unconditional love for yourself, others can sense it. No healthy relationship is built to stand on an incomplete foundation.
8. Live your life with purpose! Set goals for yourself and challenge yourself. I cannot think of time when I did not feel good after accomplishing a goal or overcoming a challenge. If you continuously set goals for yourself and work hard to achieve them, you will develop an appreciation and respect for yourself that no one else can give you.
Hope you enjoyed today’s relationships post about self-love. I would love for us to try an exercise in the comments section together. Share 3 things you love about yourself. Here are mine: 1.) I am the hardest worker I know, 2.) I love my ability to make others laugh, 3.) I love my long legs! Your turn 😉
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