Before I met Sazan, I was a hopeless romantic. I was always dreaming about what my future wife was going to be like, what she would look like, how we would meet, and the list goes on. I became so infatuated with the idea of my future spouse that I almost missed her when she came into my life.
It’s 2011. Enter Sazan into my life. When I first laid eyes on Sazan at The University of North Texas I was extremely attracted to her. She wore this fedora hat all the time with her hair in this messy pony tail “top knot” thing you girls call it, and I love how naturally pretty she was. I was instantly drawn to her outer beauty, but I knew nothing about her. I assumed she was far from my #wifeygoals and if we’re being honest here… When I first saw her I thought, “She’s probably one of those ‘Dallas’ girls who is only into guys with money.” (Dallas ladies, forgive me!) I was wrong. So very wrong.
The more I got to know Sazan, the more my heart grew for her. It sounds cheesy but she really did become my best friend. I’ll never forget the day we sat in my car at the park when she shared the complexity of her family situation. She cried and she told me her family would never approve of me or “us”. I knew little at the time about her Kurdish heritage and the cultural barriers so there was only so much I could say to her. It wasn’t about me. My heart was hurting for her because I could see the pain in her eyes. She asked that we go our separate ways and that it’s for the best. This made me start to question if she really was the one for me. I went back to the mental checklist of my future spouse and suddenly none of the expectations mattered. I couldn’t stop thinking about Sazan.
Clearly the whole going our separate ways only lasted about 48 hours. We began to embrace one another’s strengths and listen to each other, and this is when it all changed. As we began to work on our weaknesses, a once confused relationship became the best thing that had ever happened to me.
When I look back on everything, my biggest problem was that I had an expectation of exactly what I thought my wife would be. When I gave up the fantasy I thought I wanted, I was given the dream girl I never could have imagined. Sazan is everything I am not, and I like to think I’m the same for her. Thank God for not letting the false expectations blind me from seeing the great person who was right in front of me. The honeymoon phase might be over, but I look at Sazan everyday and say DANG girl, is that all that mine?? We’ll never forget the big hill we climbed to get where we are today. It’s a testament to the fact that we can conquer anything together.
Sazan, you bring me more joy than you’ll ever know. Thanks for always being by my side, baby.
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